Socialization #6

I found myself uncomfortably sitting in church this weekend listening to a pastor preaching about “society and the do’s and don’ts of it” as service went on; he spoke about the covenant that each and every person adhere to; I found myself trailing off to other thoughts on how theses social institutions detects our lives. One of the preaching that stuck out to me most was the idea how woman should summit to there husband and do his bidding and how husband be the rock that she needs and lead her down the path to salvation’s. I felt this would be the foundation to my blog post about socializations and how each reading and video correlated with each other.

In the Documentary “ Killing us softly 4” Jean Kilbourne started collecting ads in the late 1960s, inspired, in part, by her involvement with the women’s movement, her interest in media, and her experiences as a model. Kilbourne started to see a pattern in the ads – a kind of statement about what it meant to be a woman in American culture. Over the past 40 years, despite the gains of the women’s movement, Kilbourne believes advertising’s image of women has only gotten worse. Instilling values, images, and concepts of love, sexuality, success, and normalcy. They tell us who we are and who we should be. For example we’re told that the only way a women can be acceptable if they’re young, thin, white maybe light-skinned a perfectly groomed and defined, plucked and shaved and any deviation from this ideal is met with a lot of contempt and hostility.

I think the irony of is all is that advertising tells women what is most important is how they look, (There Self Worth) and ads bombard us with the ideal of what female beauty is. But this flawlessness cannot be achieved. Furthermore, men doesn’t live in a world in which there bodies are forever scrutinized, criticized and judged. Where as being “hot” has become the most important measure. This definition of sexiness makes most women feel insecure, vulnerable, and much less sexy but, lets go beyond advertising, and the effects that it has girls are constantly given the mixed messages by popular culture that they should be sexy but also ignorant, depressed, eating disorders, and low self-esteem.

“Call To Men” Tony Porter shares the idea of manhood and the roles of men (as a collective) by giving powerful stores from his own life, he shows how this mentality, is drummed into so many men and boys, can lead disregarding and mistreating and abusing women and each other he presents the “Man Box” and how we need to break free. He goes into detailing how socialization has shaped his life to first time he was pressure into having sex ( but really raping a girl) faking that he did to so he wasn’t an outcast also how he sooth his daughter when she cries but, sends his son to his room because he’s doesn’t know how to deal with him. Porter explains this way of thinking is based on what he has been taught. (Socialization)

Men usually exceed women in their efforts to assert dominance or control and tend to use touch to reinforce their status of power. (Man Box) This type of nonverbal communication is usually used as a means of defininf the status of each individual within the relationship, in which case the man would be showing the women that he is in power. Even though they we may not realize it, in most cases when watching a show or movies that portrays violent acts againt other individuals, especially women, men will contribute violence as a manly act. This is due to social learning theory of boys who grew up with the encouragement of acting within the their genderednorms. Similarly to what they are taught in thr “Act-Like_A-ManBox”, men grow up surrounded by other male figures in their life constanly reinforcements thoughout a cchild’s life “Not Cry” and “Don’t Be Such A Girl”, enforce masculine behavior and gives the impression that in order to be the man he should be he must be TOUGH.

We hear fathers tell their children to “be the bigger man” and when they see this violence through these media outlets, whether it be a TV show, movie or an advertisement that is what they contribute it to: being the bigger man. I can remember my uncle who loves telling me you got to be a man never let them see you sweat, don’t cry, go to work, build things on and on and on his favorite line that’s what a man suppose to do drumming theses ideas into my head. And I must agree with Porter that we need to redefined “The Man Box” in order to liberate both sexes

In "Parents Socialization of children and The Retro wife" each reading correlated to socialization.  Socialization of children. Study the different parenting styles (Authoritative parents who instilled self-reliant and controlled children, Permissive parents who child outcome was usually aggressive and uncontrolled and Authoritarian Parents who had fearful and moody children.) Also it looked at the cross-cultural of parenting. The different types of parents also reveal that although parenting style defers it’s manly the same some may call it a different name in parenting.

 Retro Wife touches the foundation of the recent fab for young mothers; who choose to stay home and take the traditional role.  They feel that being at home with their children gives them a better chance in life and also be there for them when they need time. I must say that after reading this I called my mother up and asked her did she regret not being a stay at home mom, did she feel like she lost out in getting to know me and teaching me the lessons that were taught to her.. She said no because she taught me whatever your goal is in life follow it. My mom went to school full time plus when she opens her on practice she was barley home and honestly because of that I learnt independence

In chapter 6 we go in depth with the idea of socialization. The things that shapes one individual throughout life.  Theses social institues that influences us from the media, work, and groups we belong to; even religion defining who we are. I always use to the line “I don’t even know who I am because I am forever changing”. To some extent I guess I should be scared of the fact of not truly ever knowing me?  But I look at it as hey life is a daring adventure or nothing at all.